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So, we had an argument — what is confidence? - MARIEMUR

So, we had an argument — what is confidence?

As you might already know, we at MarieMur strive to empower women and make them feel more confident.

And we talk quite a lot about this topic trying to figure out better ways to achieve this goal.

Our team is rather girly — there are just a couple of guys among us. So we know the struggle women deal with not just in theory. We are not exceptions, and we sometimes have issues with confidence, too.

The other day we had an interesting conversation in our group chat. The question popped up — “Are confidence and self-esteem the same thing?” It provoked a heated argument. Some of us thought that these are just two terms for one feeling. Others argued that these are two different things. 

So we deep-dived into research. And we found out some interesting ideas we want to share with you.



The main fact we’ve uncovered is quite upsetting. It’s that despite the progress in the realm of equal rights, we, women, still feel way less confident than men. 

There are quite a lot of reasons for this from the impact of the society we live in to prepossessions about females to hormonal surges. But we can’t just write off the lack of confidence on these factors and act as if it’s fine to feel less worthy. 

Our confidence depends not just on the body image but also on our career, relationships, and other aspects of our lives. However, the trick is that the way we feel ourselves and all those factors that impact us are interconnected. It means that different aspects of life from our looks to success do improve our self-esteem. Yet, the level of confidence impacts those factors as well. 

As we’ve figured this out, confidence became even more important to us. We want ourselves to be successful and happy. And by all means, we want you, our Marie Mur kittens, to be successful and happy, too. So we came up with a whole cycle of articles about confidence, the factors that impact it, and the ways to improve it. 

In this article, we want to bring light to confidence itself. What is it exactly?

How does confidence work?

We often confuse confidence and self-esteem thinking it’s the same thing. But it’s more logical to consider the latter to be just one of the parts of what we call confidence. The other two parts are optimism and self-compassion. Of course, that’s the simpler take on this matter. Yet, it should be sufficient for us now. Let’s take a look at all three ingredients in detail.

Self-esteem is about believing that we deserve to be loved and cherished, and thinking generally good things about ourselves. And self-compassion is about being kind and caring about ourselves. These two aspects stand beside each other because they’re united by a single feeling — self-love. When we truly love ourselves, we naturally want to care about our needs, mental and physical condition, and we believe that we’re worth being loved by someone else, too. 

Optimism is a different thing. It’s our ability to believe that everything will work out eventually, and we will prosper. Truly optimistic people are quite rare because the rollercoaster of life has no mercy. Nevertheless, we all should try to learn to tap into an optimistic state of mind if we want to be confident.

These three aspects combined constitute confidence — this uplifting emotion that makes us feel like we’re capable of everything. And let’s pause here and focus on this thought: confidence makes us feel powerful. Therefore, when we feel confident, we can achieve more merely because we believe that we can do what we’re up to. 



That’s precisely the reason why we decided to write about this issue. In the upcoming articles, we will talk more about the factors that impact our confidence and ways to improve it. Meanwhile, don’t forget about how gorgeous you are! And don’t allow anyone to bring down your self-esteem.

Let us know how you feel about confidence in the comments! Your thoughts will help us greatly with our future articles. 

Take care!



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First, it s depending on the country where you are and where you live, these two words do not have the same resonance.
I have travelled often and the social, male pressures and references in a country make these words interpreted very differently. (It was just an apartment).
The media, women’s magazines (often written by men) make women believe that they have a concern for self-esteem.
It is a false debate.
Just to emit that, it is you devalued yourself and you follow this order which one asks of you.
Why allow yourself to be judged by others and be a victim of this!
There is no need to esteem yourself. It’s like you’re judging yourself ! It’s stupid.
You are not several people within yourself.
You are one and only person.
You just find excuses to accept that you are bad when, on the contrary, you have to work harder to do more.
Not being good doesn’t mean you suck. It’s just that you haven’t worked enough to get to the level. The higher the level, the more work it takes. To do nothing and to lament and to find false excuses, it is to undergo the law of the society where it wants to put you.
You can do great things but tell yourself you suck. it has no connection !!! Do not create a link that does not need to be.
Confidence is the same thing.
It s a “woman word” – A man will say that he is well prepared to do this. he learns all about it. He will never speak about confidence. He can have fear, stress but as he is well prepared, he will do the job.
We are, Women, too many intellectual !!! Stop that :) Just do !!!
Go, make, create. Sometimes it s work and sometime not.
Men learn you the politic of the fail and excuse you by saying you are weak. It s false. Men make the same mistakes and no one tells them they are weak, unconfident, and low in self-esteem.

You want to wear sexy lingerie From Marie Mure. JUST DO IT.
You want to make a photoshoot, just do it.
Do not watch or listen to haters.
The vision of you is not what others tell you to be or have.
Do what you want, create your dreams !!!
Live your life and your desires, your passions. This is how societies will change and mankind will gain for the good.
In conclusion,
you don’t have to ask yourself any inner questions. Just, live your dreams, create your dreams. This is living. (A french girl)

For emancipation of all women in the world :)

Julia Ploskonis

My dear women!
Be confident in yourself, in the positive sense of the term.
But beware of becoming cynical.
Excessive self-confidence can easily turn into cynism.
With love Julia Ploskonis.

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